Ignored Pain

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Dear me,
I am sorry. I’m sorry that you tried so desperately to fix others when your own hands were shaking. I’m sorry that I didn’t give you enough time to heal, that I let you seal the wounds of everyone else whilst your own were bleeding. I’m sorry that there were days when smiling hurt but you forced yourself to laugh so that no one had to worry about you. I’m sorry that you gave all of your time and effort to people that didn’t give the same amount back. I’m sorry that there were nights when you cried yourself to sleep and no one bothered to understand why. And I am so sorry that I did not love you Like you deserved to be loved.– Inner Rambling
Not my words but I can so relate. Holding back the tears, or laughing it off like the words or actions didn't break your heart, Pretending that everything was ok and that you didn't need to step back and try to pick up the pieces of your life, of your broken heart. You kept going, because you didn't want people to see that you were hurt or broken.
I have learned now, that asking for help is the best thing, as long as you are really needing it. You are not only getting the helping but you are blessing others by receiving their blessings. I am learning to love me now, learning that the worlds' issues were never mine to try to heal and fix. I am learning that they will heal on their own,  That I create my own magic, that I can build walls to protect me, words to shield me and that I must go through the emotions but not let them cling to me as weights for the rest of my life.

Our fears are not our limits, they do not define our lives. 

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